Conversations with Yourself

(the phone rings; I picked it up and answered...)
Me: Hello? Who is it?
Him: (a very familiar deep voice) It's me.
(The nerve of this guy to think that you have been waiting for him to call... Wait a sec! Haven't you been waging a losing war with yourself whether you'll call him or not? You lost and dialed his number but you mustered all your strength to cancel it.)
Me: Huh?
Him: It's me. Jake.
Me: Oh. (You know it's him, but you still have to pretend that his existence doesnt matter to you.)
Him: Why haven't you called? I already gave you my digits last night.
Me: I was supposed to call you but... (What the hell will my excuse be? I can't tell him that I spent much of my time thinking whether to reach for the phone or not.)
Him: Supposed to? Why?
Me: uhm... I lost the card you gave me. Yeah, I lost it. (Good catch!)
Him: Oh, Good thing I called. Do I disturb you?
Me: NO!!! (Fool! You just gave yourself away.) uhm... I just finished cooking my dinner (Cooking? Well frying those eggs and hotdogs could be counted still as cooking.)
Him: Great! I've been thinking of going over your place. I've been dying to taste your...
Me: Taste my what? (What do you mean with that anyway?)
Him: Your cooking. You told me that you're good at it.
Me: Oh yeah. Right. I guessed you should come here later. My dinner is not spectacular as what you think. I'm busy with my papers now so I rushed cooking.
Him: Too bad. How about tomorrow night? Are you free?
Me: Let me check. (You know that your sched is empty; but he doesn't have to know that.) Let's meet by 5 pm.
Him: Sure. 5 pm then. I'll pick you up.
Me: Okay. Thanks. Just send me a message in my phone on the whereabouts.
Him: Sure. Bye now!
Me: Bye! (Both of you barked your goodbyes, and immediately hang your phones back because you don't want to be left behind hearing the dial tone.)

You love doing conversations with yourself. The other line is just a witness.