.png)
Not as to look bitter over my failed relationship (which i ended exactly a year ago), i cant stop pondering on what have i learned from that experience. I might say these are words of advice for you, but of course, it's a case to case basis. As long as you're happy, maintain that or move a level of intimacy and love up, and make your relationship stonger. Here they are:
1. Both of you must be very sure of your feelings before you even say it's a relationship.
Some of us start with sex first (which happened in my case; but in my part i was starting to love him already -- the one who's unsure is the other party) then see if things will work out. It would be better if you feel LIKE being friends or close for so long so that you could keep surprises (unpleasant?) to the minimum. You can't say love at first sight or else your relationship will go kaput (just my opinion).
2. Don't look for his mistakes or imperfections. Appreciate his positive and LOVING traits.
It's like looking on a clean sheet of paper with a small dot in the center; your eyes are caught by the dot instead of the clean part. Just like in a relationship, dont concentrate on his failures or little mistakes; look for his desirable traits. Much better if you'll appreciate them.
3. Never count your own troubles alone. Share them with him.
At first, I thought that by hiding my troubles i would be able to keep my boyfriend worry-free and happy. But i was wrong; the more i face them alone, the more i feel isolated and helpless; then when all boils up i cant help myself but to vent my disappointment over my boyfriend. Share your troubles how grave they may be, because the more you act together, the more you'll get stronger and earn trust and a sense of reliability.
4. If you have disagreements, call for a "time-out".
Anger and loss of temper would only lead to unnecessary arguments which may cause you to speak words that you know you'll regret later. Have a break and calm yourself. When you're cool already, it's time to discuss things then. Sex as a time-out is a yes and no --- it could either clear your mind off things or make you just feel diverted from the real point. For me, sex after reconciliation is much hotter and passionate.
5. Learn to appreciate small things.
If he just helped you with a small chore like washing the dishes or cooking, give him a kiss or say thank-you. A gesture of appreciation on sweet little things would really make your partner wanted and more confident on working things with you. After all, great things came from the small ones.
1. Both of you must be very sure of your feelings before you even say it's a relationship.
Some of us start with sex first (which happened in my case; but in my part i was starting to love him already -- the one who's unsure is the other party) then see if things will work out. It would be better if you feel LIKE being friends or close for so long so that you could keep surprises (unpleasant?) to the minimum. You can't say love at first sight or else your relationship will go kaput (just my opinion).
2. Don't look for his mistakes or imperfections. Appreciate his positive and LOVING traits.
It's like looking on a clean sheet of paper with a small dot in the center; your eyes are caught by the dot instead of the clean part. Just like in a relationship, dont concentrate on his failures or little mistakes; look for his desirable traits. Much better if you'll appreciate them.
3. Never count your own troubles alone. Share them with him.
At first, I thought that by hiding my troubles i would be able to keep my boyfriend worry-free and happy. But i was wrong; the more i face them alone, the more i feel isolated and helpless; then when all boils up i cant help myself but to vent my disappointment over my boyfriend. Share your troubles how grave they may be, because the more you act together, the more you'll get stronger and earn trust and a sense of reliability.
4. If you have disagreements, call for a "time-out".
Anger and loss of temper would only lead to unnecessary arguments which may cause you to speak words that you know you'll regret later. Have a break and calm yourself. When you're cool already, it's time to discuss things then. Sex as a time-out is a yes and no --- it could either clear your mind off things or make you just feel diverted from the real point. For me, sex after reconciliation is much hotter and passionate.
5. Learn to appreciate small things.
If he just helped you with a small chore like washing the dishes or cooking, give him a kiss or say thank-you. A gesture of appreciation on sweet little things would really make your partner wanted and more confident on working things with you. After all, great things came from the small ones.
No comments:
Post a Comment